Wednesday, June 9, 2010

Our 7 Year Anniversary

This Monday Ben and I celebrated our 7-year wedding anniversary. We enjoyed a great night out and at 6:00 p.m., the exact same time we were declared husband and wife 7 years ago to the day, we were sitting alone together in a beautiful Victorian House in downtown St. Paul overlooking a spectacular view of a neighborhood park and relishing the fact that we just ate an entire dinner uninterrupted by requests for milk refills and the task of cutting food into minuscule bite-size pieces. Having just devoured a decadent French-style dinner, the waitress presented us with an array of dessert specials and we delightfully placed our order of banana cream pie and fresh blueberry crisp with vanilla ice cream. If 7 years of marriage has taught us anything, it is that dessert is just not one of those things meant for us to share.
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The other night Ben asked me if this is where I thought we'd be after 7 years of marriage...which at first struck me as an odd question because I'm not sure anyone can honestly say they are exactly where they thought they wanted to be 7 years ago. Even though I had always thought it would be nice to be done having our babies by the time I was thirty, it never really occurred to me that such a goal would also mean my having 3 kids before our 8th wedding anniversary...mostly because when we got married, having babies and starting a family was pretty much the last thing on my mind.
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As a newly married 22 year old, I definitely had my own idea of how I thought our lives should unfold, making plans for lives and careers that really did not make time for 3 babies and a family. But, somewhere along the line God truly changed my heart and perspective. And even though I'm quite sure my 22 year old self would look upon the life my 29 year old self is leading with disappointment and a bit of arrogance at the fact that her life would turn out much differently, I am confident that my 29 year old self really wouldn't care.
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Sometimes I wish I could go back and tell that naive 22 year old how happy she was going to be in 7 years despite all the twists and turns her life would take. I wish I could tell her to relax when things didn't quite go her way because, more than likely, God had something much better in store for her. In fact, there are so many things I'd like to tell her about growing up and having a family and true dependence upon God...about finding joys in the most unexpected of places and learning to appreciate the things that matter most. However, I know my 22 year old self pretty well and I'm fairly sure she wouldn't listen to me.
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So, to answer Ben's question: No, this is not at all where I thought we'd be in 7 years when we first got married. But, I can say without a doubt that there is no other place I'd rather be. I'm thankful that God knew my heart all along, even before I did, and gave me what I needed instead of what I thought I wanted.

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