Here are a few that I remember from the past month or so...and they still make me chuckle.
After preschool one day, Olivia was very proud to recite to us the Bible verse she learned:
"The Lord is my LEOPARD!" she proclaimed.
When I asked her if she was sure it was leopard and not something like shepherd, she argued with me for quite some time about why the Lord is her leopard. Reasons included: God is strong like a leopard (in her mind a leopard is much bigger and stronger than some guy who watches over sheep), God is beautiful like a big leopard, God is fast like a leopard.
She came home from school the following week just as excited to tell us the newest verse she learned:
"The Lord is my HELPER!" she announced.
Ahhhh....now it all makes sense. She still insists, though, that the helper verse is entirely different from the leopard verse.
In the car we were having a conversation about preschool when Olivia stated, matter-of-factly, that her preschool does not have a restroom.
We argued back and forth for a good five minutes before I said in a rather exacerbated tone, "Olivia, I would not send you to a preschool where there was not a restroom. If you need to go pee or poop, there is a toilet right inside your room and I'm sure your teachers would be happy to help you."
"I know they have a bathroom, Mom," she responded, annoyed that I had just pointed out something so glaringly obvious, "but, they don't have a room with a little mat and a pillow so I can take a rest if I get tired. They really need to get a rest-room in my preschool!"
And, finally, while we were eating lunch, Olivia was telling me yet another story from preschool about her teachers and friends. When she finished the tale, she looked at me with wild eyes and yelled,
"MOM! I KNOW! I need to write all of these things down in my DIARRHEA so I can remember them!"